If you want to take bigger strides forward towards a
more fulfilling life, it’s important to look at the
embedded limiting assumptions that may be impeding
your growth. Limiting assumptions are linked to the
inflexible or narrow views we hold about ourselves
and others. These imagined or misinformed
perceptions often stop us from taking action or
looking for possibilities. One of the first things I do
with my coaching clients is help them examine and
put aside assumptions that are blocking their
success. By examining your limiting assumptions, you
can begin to reframe them and eliminate many of the
perceived roadblocks to achieving your goals.
We often get excited about making a change, trying
something new, or leaving a situation that isn’t
serving us. That excitement and energy is really our
heart and/or soul’s longing for what we truly want.
Sometimes we can stay connected to that energy or
passion, but often our limiting assumptions can put a
damper on our original passion.
Here is an example of how our limited assumptions
may sound in our heads:
“I am too old to be hired or find a great mate.”
“If I start this company, I won’t find a way to make
money/sell my product/get investors.”
“Many rich people are entitled so I don’t want to
have them as my clients.”
“If I set limits and boundaries, people will think I am
not nice, and they won’t like me.”
“If I go for the position, I will be taking it from
someone else.”
“If I ask them for help, people will see me as weak or
incompetent, or they won’t be there for me.”
“If I ask for more money, they won’t see the value
and therefore won’t use my services.”
“There are no good men/women out there. They are
all married.”
“I have to have more skills/credentials/smarts or the
economy has to get better for me to get that new
job.”
“When I gain some weight, I am less
attractive.”
Unfortunately, I could go on and on! I am sure some
of the limiting assumptions above seemed somewhat
familiar. Examining these assumptions and supplanting
them with more empowered or accurate thoughts
help us achieve our plans.
How are your limiting assumptions holding you back?
Think of an important goal you would like to achieve,
or a significant change you would like to make. When
you think of moving forward, what limiting
assumptions confront you? Take a moment to write
these down.
Now, ask yourself:
1. Is this limited assumption true in all cases?
(Are all people who ask for help weak or
incompetent?)
2. How do I know it is true? (Do I
have hard
data to support my thoughts?) Are there any
instances where this limited assumption does not
hold true? (Hmm, I do know someone in their late
fifties who met a wonderful person to marry.)
Once you have uncovered and demystified your
assumption, write down a new belief:
It is
possible
for me to
___________________. I can
be successful if I _____________________.
Repeating this new positive statement over and over
will help anchor your new expanded assumption in
your thoughts. You will be amazed at how much more
energy this will free up so you can achieve what you
want! Scroll down to the “Good News” section to be
inspired by others who changed their assumptions
and realized their dreams! To learn more about
limiting assumptions, I recommend:
“Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can
Change
Your Life” by Byron Katie and Stephen Mitchell
